Betas are in

13 DPO, beta is 175
15 DPO, beta is 401

I'm sending just those two lines of text to my sister in med school, see if she gets it! The tests were pulled almost exactly 48 hrs apart.

My calculations of dpo are based upon my own very sketchy chart from this cycle. The midwives want me to get a "dating ultrasound" sometime next week.

Trying to convince myself

I got the CVS brand tests for this week. I tried again Monday morning. If you drink too much water and wake up to pee after only 4 hours, is that still FMU? Ah well - it came out again a faint positive.

I was hoping for a firm bold positive, or even a negative. I feel in limbo.

So I went to the midwife and requested a blood test. I go back Wednesday for the second one.

If that comes out with good info, I'll publish to the blog all these I've been writing.

Midwife says Maybe?

I took the Guajolotita with to my PAP-turned-prenatal visit. Trying to pee in a cup in a tiny bathroom with a one year old is complicated.

The nurse took my vitals, then I left a sample. It came back negative. "Oh well," I shrugged. "The home test was expired after all." I offered again my FMU in the ziplock, which she took this time but also came back negative.

The midwife came in and did an annual physical, told me what tests to order from a primary care doctor if I wanted, etc. As we were finishing up, and the Guajolotita was completely losing it first for "leche" and then failing that for "pecho", there was a knock on the door.

The nurse stuck her head it. "It's a faint positive now, ten minutes later! Congratulations!"

The midwife says I can either get the 2 part blood test, to look for doubling of some number - or just pee on another stick next week. I'm pretty non-interventiony, and the kid was totally losing it. If I'm pregnant, I'll still be pregnant in a week (or not) - and either way today's result doesn't make a difference.

So... we're at Maybe till next week (or menstruation, whichever comes sooner).

3rd Prenatal Visit

I clock in at... 146 pounds! (almost - a couple of ounces shy I think)

Heatbeat was at.... 148-150! (same as last time)

And I am supposed to eat lots and lots of protein.

Tonight I substituted an entire tray of oatmeal raisin cookies.

First Prenatal Visit: there is a heartbeat!

I like the midwife office I picked more and more. They are so low-key and relaxed. I was NOT relaxed on account of being late.

The Hottest Computer Scientist in the Universe came to the appointment. He acted totally disinterested at first, but he also liked the midwife so once she came in he was friendlier. He was also so cute, reading all the materials we were given by the nurses.

She felt up my uterus and my boobs, but then the fun part (that wasn't fun? No, no it wasn't, thanks though) was hearing the baby on the doppler.

I learned there is lots of static in my abdomen! And there is also a mouse. The midwife said the heartbeat was at 160-170 beats per minute. If I was more on the ball, I would have thought of a piece with that beat and tried it out to see if it fit - have a gauge for myself. :) Tip for you when it is your turn. :)

It kinda freaked me out. It was the proof that yes, there is something in there. Woah.

Afterwards we talked about it together. THCSITU had some interesting observations: that little click-click-click (seriously sounded like a metronome over the doppler) already started a few weeks ago and will keep going for possibly 90 years! Holy smoke.

Then it occurred to me that with a heartbeat so very fast, that tiny tiny heart will beat more times inside of me than it will for the first couple of years outside! That's kind of weird.

Another question we had, is it already four chambers and compressing like our hearts? Or is it a little mass of cells pulsating rhythmically but otherwise unrecognizably? I looked it up since to find out.

Customer relations: midwife edition

In attempting to find prenatal care, I scheduled appointments with midwife practices near to where we will live when the Guajolote is born, and the hospital with the facility I like best. This was two days after finding out.

I have no clue what I am doing, beyond what the crunchy/christian/conservative/hippie masses of moms say on various forums. I freely admit that. In calls, I asked if I could schedule a consult/interview with a midwife or if it is still too early. All places said to come in. First times available were two weeks away anyhow.

Receptionist:
What's your name?

Me: [my name, first only]

Receptionist:
What?

Me: [my first name - more slowly]

Receptionist:
Hold on. (long pause) Ok, spell your name.

Me: [Spelling three lettters]

Receptionist:
Wait! You are going too fast! (very peeved tone)

Note to gentle readers: My name, while not super common, is IN THE DICTIONARY. It is a word that appears in newspapers daily, and headlines probably at least every two weeks. Besides which, I have a degree in adult education. I have worked with people who are not literate. I know how to facilitate phone communication.

Over the course of our should-have-been-briefer conversation, she made sure that I knew I was inconveniencing her. In the office at the appointment two weeks later, the disorganization was epic - I had to ask 3 times for forms to fill out before getting them 10 minutes after I arrived. And, despite being 10 minutes early, I waited an hour (late) for my appointment.

I picked the other office!!

Keeping secrets!

Another major life event I'm keeping on the DL. Bad habit I've grown. Surprising for a girl who can't keep her mouth shut usually - The Hottest Computer Scientist in the Universe must've worn off some on me.

Last weekend I was at a breast cancer awareness/fundraiser event with my dad & grandparents. My dad was definitely suspicious because I went to the bathroom like 6 times in one evening. I threw him off the scent the next day though and he bought it. Climbing up and down the hill we were on really stressed my bladder out. Come to think, that's the last day so far that I really had cramps.

Then tonight, I interviewed another midwife practice and decided to go with them. The midwife gave me some handouts, including one with information on birth classes... which I left on the counter at my dad's house! Boy did I race back in from the car when I realized it wasn't in my bag... got it though. Phew.

In other news, we will see the heartbeat at the end of August!! Yay little turkey!