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Any Spanish used in blog posts is hyperlinked to its English translation.

Sunday, August 1, 2010

TMI : things I guess it's good I *didn't* know before getting knocked up

Interminable bleeding (explains some no-sex-after-baby):
First the placenta separates from the uterus, exposing open blood vessels, and then the uterus shrinks down from over 2 pounds to just a mere couple of ounces, expelling blood, mucus and tissue as it does. You also have to figure that the amount of blood in your body increased by about 50 percent during your pregnancy, and now it’s time for things to go back to normal.... The bleeding may last anywhere from a couple of weeks to a full six, with possible spotting even later.
That's a turn off if there ever was one. And inconvenient - I have to be diapering myself at least as often as the baby. Ugh.

Constant cramping:
Your uterus is contracting as it shrinks back down to size, so the pain will be less intense than when it was pushing out a baby but still enough to be uncomfortable.... [Feeding baby triggers *more* cramping]... The pain should subside after a week or so.
In combination with the no-sleep, sure to make me a horrible person to be around.

And of course, never sleeping again:
Just to have five hours of uninterrupted rest probably sounds as close to bliss as you can imagine, yet it seems as though that will never happen – ever again. Don’t worry, it will, but we have to admit that most babies still wake to feed every two to three hours (sometimes stretching it to four hours at night if you have an exceptionally considerate baby) for the first six to eight weeks – give or take. And then it will most likely be another few months before the baby is sleeping through the night.

I am terrified I will hate staying home with a baby. Even my baby. Lack of sleep makes me very snappy. Chronic exhaustion, constant pain, bleeding all the time (possibly making extra laundry?)... well, that might just send me over the edge. Obviously, I don't *know*, but I'm worried.

Having read all that, I burst into tears at the beach today remembering that I will be physically decrepit and that this might be the last time I ever in my life look cute in a bikini.

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